| Now, me no big city doctor... This article needs a bit more detail. If you're familiar with the topic, please consider expanding it. |
| “ | "Absolute power corrupts and whatnot." | ” |
— Philge, He's a Real Loose Unit (5.01)
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Philge is a half-orc Barbarian (later Barbarian/Wizard) and member of the Dragon Friends. Philge is very large (standing at around 7'1") and extremely strong, especially after entering a Barbarian Rage.
Philge's combination of confidence, optimism and stupidity make her a natural-born leader. She quickly rises to positions of power when left on her own among goblin tribes and office workers.
Philge's half-brother, Dilge, adventures with the Dragon Friends in Waterdeep before being killed by Davin Tyrril's captive Black Dragon.
Before the Dragon Friends[]
Philge's parents were an unlikely love story: her mother was the strongest warrior in the orc army and her father was a mercenary law officer ("Policegoblin.") Their happy family was dashed when Philge discovered her father was cheating on her mother with a Fairy. He then abandoned them and ran off to the Feywild, leaving Philge with a deep resentment of authority, especially cops.
Philge also had a half-brother named Dilge, also a half-orc, but it's unknown which parent they share.
As a teen, Philge got in trouble with the town watch for tagging on horses. Her tag was a Stussy like P and she called herself "Pig Pog" and also may have drawn on cats.
Despite her tragic home life, Philge was an athletic, enthusiastic and outgoing young half-orc whose early life was filled with traditional coming-of-age awkwardness. She excelled at the javelin but was not very good with hurdles. She attended prom with a spider and wore a spider-silk dress. Her mother may or may not have eaten her father.
Philge had an aunt named Bilge who, at some unspecified point in the past, fell into a big tub of acid and lived in a cave.
Season 1[]
Philge and the other Dragon Friends have been living large in the Dragonback Tavern in Daggerford. The proprietor, Grimm Saltback, now demands that they settle their debts. Rather than just find a job, Philge tries to take up this demand with the town tenant's association, but cannot find it. She does find a loyal (dead) rat companion which she names Katy.
The Dragon Friends decide to audition as performers for the Duke of Daggerford's birthday revel. While traveling, Bobby tries to gently explain that Katy is dead, but the tender moment is interrupted by Freezo and they just let it go after that.
Philge is baffled but unbothered when Freezo randomly murders Leonard Swiftfeatures, a magician who is also auditioning as a performer. This makes them convenient targets to be framed for the Duke of Daggerford's murder and jailed. Philge's first kill in the show is their kindly jailer, Barry Swiftfeatures.
While on the run from the law, the party is abducted by Frisko's goblin tribe and put on trial for goblin crimes. Their goblin lawyer, Gribbits, explains a series of pie-based trials they must defeat to win their freedom. Instead, Philge kills Frisko and declares herself the Mother of Hobgoblins. This is not the end of Bobby and Freezo's captivity however as the newly ascendant Philge declares, "Me want see how this plays out."
When the party is reunited in Waterdeep, they make off with all of the tribe's money and work on meeting the demands of Bobby's ex-employer Janos Meer and the Waterdeep Guild of Thieves, Tricksters, and Beggars. Philge spends much of this period with Gribbits strapped to a desk on her chest like a baby. During a shopping trip in the city they run into Philge's wizard half-brother Dilge. He is eager to join them on their adventures. Despite normal sibling competitiveness, Philge and Dilge are happy to be in each other's company.
This family reunion ends in tragedy when Davin Tyrill, the very man who framed the Dragon Friends for the Duke's murder, attacks them with a mind-controlled Black Dragon. Dilge is killed while trying to protect her. She is too in shock to deal with this loss right away but is profoundly affected by it in the interval before Season 2.
In the Season 1 finale, she misunderstands Davin's master plan so badly that she actually ends up accelerating it. This has huge ramifications for their friend Kithercy Gellantara but otherwise turns out fine.
Season 2[]
Season 3[]
Philge appears to have arrived in 2075 several days before the other Dragon Friends. She was recruited by Mr. Sour and completed a mission for him, and was then free to get a job in the Horizon corporation where she discovered a remarkable natural talent for hacking and computers that enabled her to rise to Junior Vice-President, and also apparently had a "thing" with fashion designer Raoul Chamgerlain. The other Friends accepted Mr. Sour's further offer of work in part to track her down, and were referred to her to explain their failure to protect Johnny Playstation from being snatched by Voss-Saito. She agreed to rejoin them to help recover Johnny.
Her help initially consists of punching Bobby for looking too much like Raoul and flirting with Glitter Gleam, bursting into Glitter's private quarters and attacking two riot police with a pair of fruit platters, wrecking several civilian cars while attempting to carjack them, and being trapped in a net by riot police. Mr. Sour then obtains a cyberdeck for her and she is able to act in her element, disabling LAICEU, the ZOG Bank security AI and enabling the Friends to enter Freeside - but then blowing up an ATV by siphoning helicopter fuel into it.
Arriving at a chapter camp of the Tribe Of A Million Kings, Philge killed the leader to take command of the tribe and claim their weapons and armor, then drank 12 mid-strength beers at the Brisvegas Ute Muster. On arrival at the Haystack casino, she attempted to seduce Julian Fairbanks, then ate 6 million credits of his poker chips and then vomited them and the 12 mid-strength beers over him. These credits would have paid the Friends' way into the Skyway Lounge with plenty to spare, but instead she bet them all on roulette and lost before getting them all captured for the robbery of Julian. She aids their escape by staging a fight with Freezo and ascends to Freeside with them where she fly-tackles Johnny Playstation and accidentally hits him with a skateboard. Philge is able to protect the other Friends from the arriving cops and stoot-men and then to defeat Sirius-8 Dumbleboy in a hacking duel to seize control of the Zhivago Twelve, elite hacking crew who aid the Friends in sneaking into the Freeside control room.
Within Freeside, Philge is able to perform the incredible feat of entering the Matrix again while already in the Matrix to enter communication with Julian Fairbanks' AI and learn of his plan to destroy Freeside. She successfully bluffs Mr Terminal into handing over his overload unit tuned to kill the Zhivago Twelve but accidentally kills Hermione the Ranger Danger by stamping on it, believing this would disarm it. After Mr Terminal is revealed as a peripheral, Philge's hacking skills enable her to trace the identity of its operator to discover Michael Hing (NPC), who she is instrumental in defeating via a stirring speech on the value of friendship; and it is Philge who plugs Johnny Playstation's cryocell into the Freeside Matrix node, resulting in his apotheosis.
Tomb of Annihilation[]
Philge's achievements in Chult include banging a half-orc pirate and solving a puzzle by twisting a wizard's head off.
Season 4[]
Philge was the first to awake on the Heart of Glass after it was created by Johnny Playstation and made the ships captain. She travelled across the 9 known worlds with the dragon friends attempting to find out what happened to the 6 months of memories they are missing. She helps rescue Precious Bonathan on the Staturnine .While on trial in Prime she successfully pleads for their lives in court saying Hyperion Max's body has not been found so he might not be dead. Unfortunately this was instantly undone by Freezo stating that if they were killed they wouldn't divulge the location of the body.
After escaping prison in the house eternal and picking up some wondrous miniatures in the Deadlands (that were never used) they return to reclaim the Heart of Glass from Lady Cassilda, Philge dealing the final blow by stomping on her neck till it cracks. At the season's end when Mystra takes Freezo away she hands him her club as parting gift
Season 5[]
Philge becomes the Duke of Daggerford before allowing the other Dragon friends and Lionshield Banknote to share responsibilities. She entrusts the fire department to their new Pelican friend Crawford. In vantage Philge breaks her amulet of the black skull and turns to skull before being restored by La Croix.
Philge successfully solves the murder of Constance Hofferman, Having listened to a certain podcast she surmises that Diemetra was the murder with a poisoned candle oil. She gains a new hammer Thunder's Wank Wake. In the season finale Philge's blood is needed to resurrect Strahd Von Zarovich; her blood is taken and the Dark Lord returns. However before Carcossa can be brough back Philge uses Thunder's Wake to destroy the Tome of Knowledge saving Daggerford from Carcossan doom.
Season 6[]
During the three years that pass after the end of season 5, Philge remains in Daggerford and gets by with a complicated side-hustle involving the sale of intricate clocks. She also learns to read from a talking dog (who was in turn taught to read by a talking dolphin), and unlocks an inner magical power, learning the cantrips friends and one other, as well as the first level spell find familiar, allowing her to summon a hawk familiar, Flappy.
During her time with the resistance against Strahd, Philge helps to rescue and then finds herself attracted to Greatheart Banknote, Lionshield’s father. They team up with an army of resistance fighters, led by Greatheart, to try and thwart Strahd’s plan to access an ancient Netherese Lodestone hidden in the north.
During the final confrontation with Strahd in the mage tower where he has brought the Lodestone, Philge summons Flappy and orders him to remove Strahd’s helmet to give Bobby a clear shot with a magical arrow, but Strahd grabs Flappy and beats him unconscious. Philge damages the Lodestone with her hammer, which causes psychic feedback that injures Strahd. Strahd shows the friends a vision of his forces decimating the resistance army, including one of his giants smashing Greatheart from his horse, enraging Philge who slams Strahd into the Lodestone, damaging it further. The vampire warns her against cracking it further, but Philge ignores him and slams Strahd into it again, disintegrating him but also activating the Lodestone’s “failsafe” mechanism, sending the Dragon Friends back in time to before the fall of the Netherese empire.
Season 7[]
Philge goes along with Bobby’s plans to try and change history while in the past, and resists the time sickness better than most of her friends. They encounter Paternius von Zarovich, Strahd’s father, and Bobby kills him hoping to prevent Strahd’s birth; but Strahd has already been born, and they must flee his wrath before returning to their own time. In the present, they find history has changed - for the worse. Strahd made use of stolen knowledge of the future, establishing an eternal empire.
They return to the past again, this time posing as gods. Philge declares she is “the God of Rocks”. They find and kill the young Strahd and once again return to their own time. In this timeline, without Strahd to lead the rebellion against them, the Netherese Empire never fell. Their ruler Karsus still lives, using false stories of the Dragon Friends “gods” to enslave the population and force them to donate their life essence to power their magical city. The Dragon Friends rally their various religions to fight back, Philge discovering that her druid-like followers live outside of the city, and have secret paths through the earth. She helps them all to overthrow Karsus the Kind before the Friends travel back in time once more, taking with them an alternate history version of Lionshield Banknote.
In the past one last time, the Friends ally with Strahd and the Free Folk to overthrow Karsus, but Lionshield is utterly destroyed in the process.
Season 8[]
The Friends celebrate their great victory, and the morning after Philge wakes up in bed with Bobby. Neither seems sure what happened. The Friends are still affected by time sickness, but the destruction of the Netherese Empire means there’s no easy way for them to travel back to their own time, so Vowell builds them a “Coldcell Engine”: they'll go into suspended animation until they can awaken in their rightful place in history, one thousand years later.
They are woken 25 years later when the magical power source for the Engine fails, and Philge and the others go on a quest to find a dragon egg as a replacement. They’re accompanied by Byron, the son of Baston and Merrelline Vowell, conceived during the victory celebrations. During this adventure Bobby brings up he and Philge's apparent night together - from their perspective it’s still the next day - wondering what did or didn’t happen. Philge doesn’t want to talk about it. Philge finds a new magical weapon, a gulthias staff, and a book of spells in a language she can read, goblin.
After getting back into the Coldcell Engine, they are awoken again about a century later when magical warfare rocks the Engine chamber and shakes the egg loose. They discover that the von Zarovich tragedy has repeated itself, causing a devastating war between Barovia and Carcosa. The friends are sent to bring news to the paranoid War Master, Lord Ravenloft, that might end the war, but instead they kill Ravenloft’s second in command and are imprisoned, losing most of their magical items in the process. Byron helps them escape (and recover some of their weapons, including Thunder’s Wake), but Baston is mortally wounded with an arrow. Seeking to save their friend, they take his unconscious and dying body to the mysterious Sonic Church, which didn’t exist in the Friends’ own timeline.
Additional Reading[]
Character Sheet Gallery[]
